Monday 2 July 2012

thoughts...

view, kirchenbuckerl, lam, june 2012
it is my home. i am born there, i grew up there. i am still there. sometimes. but when i am there i still feel that is my home.

i live in a lot of other places. those are different. very different. they are cities, different countries, different people. when i tell them about my home they have a picture. mostly a picture which is not just different from what it is. but that is ok. and not the point and not interesting.

people, swimming pool, lam, june 2012
umbrella, swimming pool,  lam, june 2012
tabletennistable, swimming pool, lam, june 2012
benches, swimming pool, lam, june 2012
tree, swimming pool, lam, june 2012

if you come from the village most of the time if you meet people from the city (and it depends of course) it is very difficult i find to make them understand that is nice to live there. if they have no connection at all. if they have some most of the time it takes time to convince them that it is nice.

that you can do things there, cause there is nothing there and whatever you are saying it feels it is not enough, because it sounds not the same what they are doing. i think.

every single time i am talking to people who are coming from the village i think like that. at least.

working, swimming pool, lam, june 2012
slide, swimming pool, lam, june 2012

children pool, swimming pool, lam, june 2012
villages are a symbol. producing ideas. the same like with big cities. like new york.

new york is full filling your dreams, pure happiness, freedom, rushing around, being part of the city, being hip. i don't know. i had this. when i went there it was just a city, with traffic, with people, with payments, with cafes. good things, bad things. maybe those stereotypes, if you are lucky.

a village is slow, withdrawn, gossipy, traditional, old fashioned, boring, little amount of pubs, strange boring clubs and nothing to do but just waiting for life. villages are also getting romantisied. pure living, getting back to the roots, knowing everybody and beeing part of the community. i guess.

i talk to a lot of my friends. some of them come and when they come they are disappointed. because it is not in in the forest, one house surrounded by cows and trees, because we have supermarkets, the houses are bigger then one level, people are fashionable, and are not. having streets which are pretty, also streets which are just streets, empty shop spaces. signs for tourists, advertisment for over 30s and under 30s clubs.

football place, lam, june 2012
children, lam, june 2012
football balls, lam, june 2012

the less you know something about something as more your brain is getting filled up with associations, personal memories and influences. one point.

second point much more straight forward. a village is not boring. a village is just a village is just a village.

both means: old days the villages developed certain stereotypes, such as withdrawn, old fashioned, beautiful, harmonic, all that shit. maybe that was true. in case of my village yes.


50 years ago there were still mostly farmers in my area, we got the clothes from the local market, access of knowledge and possibilities, being open and tolerant. maybe. i think.

but nowadays we also have cappuccino and digital tv, we have internet and label clothes. cars and books are existing and people are interested.

more football kids, lam, june 2012
more football kids, lam, june 2012
more footballkids, lam, june 2012
of course but the stereotype is still the old one. because it is more comfortable, more possibility of playing with your dreams. 

stairs, lam, june 2012
garden, lam, june 2012

more important for me. i love my village. but not just out of nostalgic reasons as probably a lot of people mean, but because i am feeling honored that i am able to be part of. and not to see it like that.
but instead being able to feel it like that, being not a stranger, but rather enjoying the feeling of not wondering.

i like to go to foreign places. yes i do. and i like to wonder. get surprised, see everything with fresh eyes, being not part of it. imbeded.

with my village i want to, cause it is an experience a lot of people do not have. because it is never the same, even if you move there. in a place like new work you can be imbeded, because everybody is not from new york. that's why it feels so comfortable. same same experience.

a typical thing in a village. you have to be born there to get the idea. but that's just a general statement, a theory as everything.


different thoughts:.....


way, lam, june 2012
this is the way i used to go during my primary school up there. with friends, from theater, school theatre. they had to go somewhere else. i could go a shorter way but i walked with them this way to spend more time with them.

kindergarden, lam, june 2012
this was not where i was. i was in a smaller one. i stayed there for the whole day, because my parents had no time. but i liked it. i slept there with lot of other kids, in a big hall in little beds. we thought we were always very cheaky pretending to sleep. the kindergarden woman nitting in front of us.

churchwall, lam, june 2012
playing with a lot of kids hid and seek. one afternoon we played so long. i forgot the time. so many kids, my sister, my cousin. it was so cool. i felt like it was the best day ever. late i came home. my parents furious. was on the playground next to the church too long. maybe 50 meters away from home, but miles in my head.

secret way, lam, june 2012
this was the secret way, next to the library and townhouse. we went there, sometimes, special occasions. when we wanted to be quick, not been seen. we never used it for normal occasions. just to be quick. not sure why and when we used it. but we felt brave.

gemeinde, lam, june 2012
the way to the kindergarden: one time i forgot my snackpacket at home. i had to go to the kindergarden. alone. i reached there and recognised it. i cried. the place was about 100 meter away from home.
flowershop, lam, june 2012
i always picked up the fresh rolls with my mother, not every morning. but sometimes. the rolls where hard outside. dry cracked and bits of the roll split up when you divided the roll in half, bit a piece from it. the woman in the shop was old. friendly, soled us sometimes ice cream. 10 pfennig the piece. the big one. or little sweets.

library, lam, june 2012
when i was really young i did not read. my parents did not buy that many books. i think. they probably would disagree. i feel. but then i started reading. a lot. i finished teh right section of the kids department of the local library, then the left. 5 friends, edith blyton, tkg, 3 question marks. then major section. kafka, rosemunde pilcher. everything. audio, records, later  fancy cds.

i had always huge of piles of books, every sunday between 10 and half 10 when it was open. got them, took them home. a little bit like christmas.

two houses, library, lam, june 2012
memories has everybody, everywhere, feeling home, secure, in a city, in a village. i guess i am just glad to have this one because i have it.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

pictures and thoughts
like reflections of
my own childhood

en da lam
a secret place
voller bedeutung

gesichter und orte
mit den spuren
vergangener zeit

like ancient
memories like
visions in a dream

und afra moi
bin e ganz kloa
kloina wei e damais war

Unknown said...

pictures and thoughts
like reflections of
my own childhood

en da lam
a secret place
voller bedeutung

gesichter und orte
mit den spuren
vergangener zeit

like ancient
memories like
visions in a dream

und afra moi
bin e ganz kloa
kloina wei e damais war